Fan-mail excerpts

The typical letter that I receive from a student goes pretty much like this: Hello Ryan teacher! My name is X. How are you? Good. I like you because you is/are tall/handsome/kind. My favorite class is Y (where Y is rarely the class that I've taught them), because it is very fun. Do you like pizza/soccer? Goodbye. I love you. X Even though I'm sure they tell it to everyone, or maybe just so I'll give them more excellent stamps, it's still very good for one's self-esteem to hear 'teacher so handsome!' a dozen times everyday. And it's generally the boys that say it... Here are a few of the more random excerpts that I received recently:

You're handsome and tall. All people in the world like handsome man! I'm not tall, so I like you...When I grow up I want to look like your face (but I'm woman...) This means "I really like your face". Wendy I want to be like your (not your body) mind. Jack

I like you because you're very kind. I think. Sky Ryan I think you are very kind in SEV! Because you are not hit and make angry. I want to be like your (not your body) mind. Jack I can't see your angry. Anon. You said the post office teacher is excellent. I think she is excellent. But she is a little bit boring. Sally

I like you and yummy for breakfast, lunch, dinner. You're nice and excellent. You're class very fun and not boring and kind. Good bye teacher. I love you. Kerry In your class I was surprise, because you bend your knee at team 10. So, I promise your saying. Sally I like you Ryan teacher. You broked my glasses but it is ok. Sam